How to deal with aging parents
Dealing with an aging parent who refuses necessary medical care has the potential to become a nightmare for you as well as your loved one. Prioritize communication, make the benefits of medical care crystal clear to your parent or other relative, repeat those benefits and don’t give up in your attempt to help your parents.
Steer your parents toward timely medical care and they will stand a much better chance of living long, healthy and happy lives. However, dealing with negative elderly parents has the potential to still prove quite challenging even if you go out of your way to clearly communicate your thoughts. Let’s take a quick look at a few strategies that will help the adult children of senior citizens productively discuss the potential for receiving medical care.
Why do elderly refuse help?
Some elderly individuals refuse the help of others as they are too self-reliant to ask for assistance or even take it after offered. Other elderly individuals refuse the assistance of others as they genuinely believe they can take care of their own needs without a helping hand. In other situations, seniors feel as though they are a burden on their adult children or others who offer help. However, seniors who are provided with at-home care assistance in the house are more likely to be open to the idea of a helping hand simply because it is a professional doing his or her job.
When to intervene with elderly parents?
If your elderly parent refuses assistance, don’t blindly insist on providing it or coordinating it through an in-home care service. Highlight your loved one’s reasoning for not wanting assistance and argue against that point. Even if your elderly parent does not give in right away, he or she will think about your argument moving forward and prove that much more likely to accept assistance. However, if your elderly parent’s health or well-being declines to the point that it is quickly diminishing his or her quality of life or chances of survival, do not hesitate to intervene to coordinate care.
How to convince elderly parents they need help
Convincing an elderly parent he or she needs assistance has the potential to be as simple as showing him or her potential outcomes for failing to accept a helping hand. Describe the low quality of life, pain and other setbacks that will inevitably occur if your aging relative refuses to accept assistance.
If you still can’t’ convince your loved one to accept assistance, don’t hesitate to involve others. Bring your relative’s treating doctor into the conversation, give him or her the opportunity to provide input along with custom-tailored recommendations for care and your parent might be more open to the idea of receiving medical assistance.
Ways To Talk To Aging Parents Who Refuse Help
Broaching the subject of potential medical assistance is often the most challenging component of talking to a parent who refuses the care of others. Having a formal sit-down meeting with your loved one might not inspire him or her to listen closely and take action. Some seniors respond better to the written word.
Consider writing down your thought and sharing them with your loved one. A written letter just might help make progress. If necessary, involve the treating doctor or a therapist so your loved one understands it is not strictly you who wants him or her to segue to medical care in his or her golden years.
When elderly parents won’t listen
When in doubt, be patient and do not force the issue. The prospect of receiving medical care will inevitably arise in the future. The question is whether you will make a convincing enough argument each time the subject is broached to build momentum toward your loved one proactively seeking medical care. When making suggestions, carefully select language to frame the information in the most appealing manner.
There is no shame in stating how your loved one’s refusal to accept medical care is affecting your personally. If you feel as though your life is not the same as a result of spending so much time caring for a relative, let it be known, point him or her toward professional care provided in the home and the stage will be set for a mutually beneficial transition.
How to deal with stubborn elderly parents dementia
If your parents are stubborn when it comes to the issue of home care or medical care in general, you will find comfort in knowing you are not alone. A parent who has dementia or one who is stubborn to a fault might seem impossible to deal with when discussing the subject of medical care. Refrain from losing your cool, remain focused on the subject matter and stay calm throughout the conversation.
If your family member’s stubbornness causes to you to feel angry, do not hesitate to walk away from the conversation so you can settle down and eventually revisit it in the future. Take your time, let the idea of medical care provided in the home marinate in your loved one’s mind and he or she just might have a change of heart in the months ahead.
Helping aging parents who don’t want help
An aging parent who refuses help might not feel the same way about the matter a couple weeks or a couple months from now. Do not lose hope. Continue to tout the merits of home care and other forms of care to your loved one, stress the importance of maintaining an open mind and seize the opportunity to highlight ways in which medical care provided in the home would greatly improve your relative’s quality of life.
Above all, recognize that your relative likely wants help yet is ashamed, too proud or simply hesitant to ask another person for assistance. Do your best to make it clear that your loved one’s need for care is not a burden and you’ll rest easy knowing you’ve done your part to coordinate timely and effective home care.